Gut Feeling

Have you ever had that feeling, or should I say knowing, inside of you telling you to do something? Maybe it is to answer an alter call, pray for someone in the middle of the night, or lay your hands on someone for healing.

I recently had one of these experiences which I like to call "heart squeezes". I felt led to lay hands on someone and pray for their healing. At first I thought maybe I was just imagining things, for after all, I have been reading about healing/the laying on of hands in my Bible correspondence course. But as I thought about it I decided I wouldn't have peace and be able to enjoy the rest of my day if I didn't. (And if it was just my imagination, praying for someone definitely wasn't going to hurt anything!) If you know me, you would know that I do NOT like praying in front of other people. It is just something I don't do. So this was not only uncomfortable because of who I was to pray for, but also because I would have to literally pray aloud for someone! Talk about way out of your comfort zone!!! When I stood up to do it, the prayer came easily, and though I was a little uncomfortable, God sent peace to me. It was pretty amazing. And now I can look back and say that I did it. I listened to God's urging through my spirit. And I am so happy that I did.

Have you had an experience like that? Have you ever been the recipient of something like that? have you had an amazing peace flood over you when doing something difficult? What have been some of your experiences when it comes to that "heart squeeze"? Listening to God is always worth it. Not matter how uncomfortable it may feel at the time, it will most likely be more uncomfortable if you don't follow God's leading. You may end up thinking about it all day, or regretting it for a long time afterward.

~ S*

Lists!!

I am a list person. I do things so much more efficiently if I have made a list of all the things that I need to accomplish.

A couple days ago, while praying and studying in my morning quiet time, I decided to make a list of all the things I could be thinking about/doing in preparation for my future.

As much as I am looking forward to marriage, moving out, etc. I think it will be a MAJOR wake up call. I have taken so many things for granted. My parents have provided lots of things for me up to this point in my life, so what will I truly be getting myself into when I am out "on my own"?

Here are a few things on my list:
1. Make a list of expenses in running my own home (try to get accurate dollar amounts)
2. Make a schedule/list of things/responsibilities I will have when I am in charge of my own home.
3. Make a list of the necessary items "we" (we being my husband and I *sigh*) will need to start out in a new home.
4. a. Create a budget with the above things I have learned.
4. b. What would it be like to add a child to the mix?
5. Grocery list! What will I need to be shopping and clipping coupons for?
6. Wedding list and budget!! :) (I, of course, had to throw something fun into this new reality)

And I could go on, but I think you get the idea. Whoa! MAJOR wake up call. These are things I had not given even the slightest thought to in the past. What in the world am I going to do when I have a husband of my own to take care of? What about KIDS!?! I personally plan on waiting a few years to add them, but you never know... :)

I have always wanted to begin preparing myself for wife-hood... (is that a word?) by doing things NOW. However, I am slowly realizing I am far from being prepared! What are you doing to prepare for your future? Are you one to "cross that bridge when you get to it"? Or are you a list maker/planner like me? What are some other things that I should prepare for that are not on my list? What other things can I be doing to honor my spouse right here right now?

One thing I have done (or should I say do quite often) is pray for my future husband! And I am hoping that he is doing the same thing for me. Am I doing my job at answering those prayers? Am I becoming the woman that I think he would want? Some of the things on my "list" for a future husband could be on his "list" for a future wife! Am I following my own list of desires in a mate and becoming who/what I expect him to be? We shall see soon enough, but I want to be as ready as I can be for that special someone when he comes into my life!

~ S*

Long Time Away...

Okay, I am back for a few days...

These past couple weeks my mind has wondered a bit... Thinking about my future husband, wanting to be held... kissed, that sort of thing. Watching the Hallmark Channel for a few days will do that to you... :)

Anyways. Have you ever watched older people? Have you ever admired them? Have you ever hoped that you wouldn't turn out like them? I have wonderful examples in my grandparents! Both have been married for a very long time!!! And I believe are still happily so. Watching them hold hands, or look into the eyes of each other is so romantic!!! It is like seeing God's perfect plan right in front of you!! A little touch of heaven! Do you have good examples in your family? Do you have some not so good examples that you can learn from? We can watch and learn from not only our parents, but our grandparents! We should take advantage of their knowledge! It is also VERY fun to listen to their stories of how they met! (If you ask them, try asking them at different times to see how their stories differ! :D )

As I said above, God has blessed me with wonderful Grandparents!! I have probably taken them for granted... We should be thankful for all of the blessings we have! Especially our loved ones!

~ S*

Out of Town...

Sorry all, but I am not going to be home for the rest of the week. So I do not know that I will be posting much while I am away.

Thought for the day: Why is it "safer" to go to college, spend all of your money (or go into debt with a student loan), and do a bunch of school work, when you don't know what classes to take, and you don't feel led to go? Is there any logic in that?

I didn't go to college after graduating High School, but I am still happy with the choice I made. I have often told people that I want to be a Stay-At-Home-Mom... The most common response is "What if that doesn't happen? Then what are you going to do? I thought that is what I wanted too, but now look at me..." And so on... Most of the people that have this point of view do not have a relationship with the Lord. I personally believe that if I am ever supposed to go to college God will give me the desire to do so. I have a strong desire to get married. Until then I am content to wait, and see what God has planned for me in my single life! I know He is watching out for me, so I am just trusting Him with my life. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths." (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Let me know your thoughts! :)

~ S*

Let's Make It Interesting...

Haven't really come up with much to write about today... But I do have a question for my readers... What do you do to make your daily Bible reading more interesting? What are your favorite translations to read? I am really interested in your opinion, for I believe I am going to get a new translation soon!

I have read the Bible all the way through a few times now, so I am trying to find different ways for it not to be so... I don't know... "I've read it all before, so what more is there to get out of it?" I have read it in chronological order, I have read it in a year, (I have read it in longer than a year), etc...

This time through I have decided to do some highlighting and underlining... Do you ever do that? I have four different colored highlighters, and I am using them for different reasons. Since I am into the romance/marriage thing, I have chosen the pink highlighter for this section of scripture... I will underline with it, or completely highlight the text depending on what it says. I have chosen yellow for healing, blue for "Fear Not"(I've been told that it is said 365 times... We'll see if I can find them all...), and orange for whatever else may interest me.

I would love to read suggestions below!! :) Happy reading!!!

~ S*

I'm Forgiven!!!!

Yes, you can tell I have been reading! I have finished book number two in the "Firstborn" series by Karen Kingsbury. As you can tell by the title a main subject of the book was forgiveness.

Have you ever had guilt about something, and you couldn't get past the thought of it until you apologized or made things right? I have had a few instances of this in my life. A couple times it was years afterward that I confessed my sin to someone and apologized. It can really be damaging to your quiet time with God if you have an unresolved issue in mind. The best idea is to face the issue, apologize if necessary, and come to peace with it. Believe me, it may be uncomfortable at the time, but it is WAY worth it in the end!

And if there happens to be something in your life where you can't physically go to someone and apologize, God has forgiven you. All He wants you to do is lay your sin at his feet, accept His forgiveness, and never look back. The amazing thing about God is that He truly forgives and FORGETS! Oh, how I wish I was able to forget certain things that have happened after I have forgiven the situation. The Bible says in Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." I don't know about you, but I want to prayerfully give my burdens (whether they are unforgiveness, lies, cheating, stealing, lustful thoughts, disobedience, etc...) completely to God. He sent His Son, Jesus, to die on the cross for our sins! His one and only Son! That is how much God loves us! Jesus's blood has wiped us clean! We don't have to live with our "dirty laundry" anymore. He has FORGIVEN us! And He has permanently forgotten it!

How AWESOME is that!?! Are there things in your life holding you back? Let God have them. '"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."' (John 8:11 NIV)

~ S*

"In my own little corner...

...in my own little chair, I can be whatever I want to be..."

This morning I had the house all to myself, so I did what I love to do. Stayed in bed until 12:30! :) I was awake though, around nine. After reading my Bible, praying, and doing some of my RHEMA Bible Correspondence course, I did something really fun... Daydream...

I wrote a story with my imagination. In a small town in Indiana, there was an eight year old girl who befriended the new boy, who just moved into town during the middle of the school year. They were soon best friends, and continued to be best friends through their senior year of high school. The girl (we'll call her Lindsay) fell in love with the boy (Jason) while they were in 8th grade. However, she never told Jason, for fear that it would ruin their friendship. Jason loves football, and he played starting quarter back throughout high school. He got a full scholarship to Ohio State to play football. On graduation day, after spending the last few days of school with Lindsay, he decided he was falling in love with her. As the summer progressed, he and Lindsay were trying to enjoy, what was possibly their last, summer together. Upon the last week of his summer at home, Jason finally told Lindsey that he had fallen for her...

*sigh* There's more, but you get the idea. ;) Do any of you spend time imagining how you will meet Prince Charming? I have thought of many different ways I could meet my future spouse! :D Have you ever sat there imagining a fictional love story? I would love to hear about them! I have often made up stories that involve a trial where, through prayer and love, God brings the characters out of it! Many cool possibilities when imagining your own story. (And you don't need to remember a book!) :D

~ S*

Four Days in a Row!!!

I can hardly believe I have done this (made a new post) four days in a row! I don't usually do that. (As you probably already know) Today has been a bit busy for me, so not much guys stuff on my mind. It will probably work its way in about 10 o'clock... :) *sigh*

Little story for you all... Just so you know I am 21... I have never had a boyfriend, been on a date, kissed a guy, and to be completely honest I don't even know a guy that I would marry... (At least I don't think I do...) But... This does not mean that I have never been asked out by a guy before...

A co-worker of mine wanted to introduce me to her son (who, if I remember correctly, is a year older than me). The idea intrigued me, so I kinda made the mistake of saying I might be interested. So a few weeks later, I was training a new associate, and my supervisor was at the register behind me...

*Bunny trail... I am a blusher. I tend to blush a lot. It doesn't take much to make me blush. And I can usually tell when I am blushing. My entire cheeks turn red (from the apple all the way down to my jaw line.) I can usually feel them grow hot. Sometimes when I am really uncomfortable/embarrassed I can feel the blush all the way through the tips of my ears... *

Not so good: Okay, so my co-worker told me earlier that day that her son might show up (so at least I had a little heads up.) She then informed me (for the first time) that he was adopted, and he wasn't originally from America... (more on that another day) And he didn't have the same beliefs that I do (different denomination entirely). So... Later while I am training someone and my supervisor is right behind me, she walks up with him. (For the sake of this blog I will call him Steve.) Right in front of my supervisor and training buddy!!! Steve introduced himself, and I shook his hand. (I'm trying to be polite, and OH MAN I don't think I have been so uncomfortable ever!!! Talk about blushing!) His mom then left us. So, he then asks me if we could "hang out" sometime. PANIC!!! I was freaking out in my mind, my heart was going a thousand miles a minute... What was I going to do??? I wasn't interested at all... Then I remembered something that my family and I had talked about, but hadn't officially decided to do (I got the idea at the purity conference I mentioned yesterday.)... I said, "Well, you would have to ask my dad about that first." Steve kinda chuckled and obviously thought I was joking. (keep in mind my supervisor and trainee are standing right there watching all of this unfold...) I said, "No, really, I am serious, I can give you his number if you want." Talk about surprise, I think he was trying to keep from panicking himself. So then he said okay what is it (while holding his cell phone out ready to put the number in his phone book.)? I gave it to him, we said a tiny bit more, and then he left. (Whew! Talk about relief)

After he left my supervisor and trainee both talked to me about it for the next hour. They said we were wearing the same color and style shirts, etc... Then my supervisor asked me if I really thought he would call. I told her I had no idea; she, however, said he would. On my next break I called my house and told my parents what happened (just in case he would call)...

He never did call... I befriended him on Myspace at one point and pretty much told him I wasn't interested in anything but a friendship. And he never tried to pursue that.

Good things: Well, now I have business cards with my dad's sir name and phone number. I carry them with me everywhere. I NEVER want to get caught in that panic again. My dad and I have now discussed things a little more; we have an idea what we would do if there was a guy (I was actually interested in) going to call him. I survived the experience, and I must admit, it did feel good to know that a guy could possibly be interested in me. I learned later that he thought I was beautiful! (How sweet is that!!) Also, my supervisor (along with lots of other people I work with) watch me. That day my supervisor learned a few things about me. Such as, I have a good relationship with my dad, I listen to my dad, I value his opinion, etc... I think my supervisor is interested in knowing how my story will end. "Are Susan's standards too high, is it possible to have a first kiss wedding, etc..." I can use this experience as part of my example to people I work with (and maybe even others like you).

What I should have done: I could have probably prevented the situation if I would have taken the time to get to know about him through his mom before ever encouraging her to hook us up. I totally just got all googoo "maybe I will finally meet my Prince Charming" and lost all common sense. If I would have learned that he didn't really even follow his parent's churches/religion, and other aspects about him, I could have informed his mom that I didn't want to be unequally yoked with my husband. And I was (and still am not) interested in wasting my time on a relationship that I know won't go anywhere.

Have you ever had an experience like this? How did you handle it? Do you like the idea of having a business card in your pocket? Do you have any ideas or suggestions of things I could/should have done? What else could I take from this experience?

~ S*

Put God Fist.... (Even when I am married)

Hmmm... I was in bed this morning thinking and praying, and I had a thought as to what I could make my post about today... But now that I am sitting here at the computer I can't remember what it was I was going to tell you...

(Ten minutes later...) Well, I am still trying to remember what it was I was going to talk about, but I will start by saying that I was praying for my husband this morning. I was thinking about what I hoped he would be doing right now. I like to pray blessings over him, which can include favor with co-workers, bosses, professors, fellow pupils, etc... Things that I hope he would be praying over me!

(Pause for another minute... Almost remember...) OH!!! I got it!! I was laying there praying and imagining if I was married, and a thought occurred to me. If I was married right at that very moment, I would have woken up beside my husband (maybe cuddled up to him or something... *sigh*) Anyways, I always do my Bible reading, Bible Correspondence Course, and praying while still in bed in the mornings. If I was married, how would that change the way I spend time with God? It would dramatically change it! I would most likely wake up to a kiss from my husband, talking to him, asking him how he slept, etc... Whereas, I wake up now thanking God for the day, praying, reading my Bible, etc... (and daydreaming about my future husband...) When this occurred to me, I kinda felt like I would be betraying God if I were married. After all, I would thoroughly enjoy a wake up kiss from my husband, so how could I put God first in this area of my married life? I would no longer have the quiet alone time that I have every morning.

A little bunny trail for you, I have often had, what I call, conversations with God. Where I pray and ask God something, and He flat out gives me an answer. I have spent hours talking to God. The first time I experienced this I spent an entire afternoon talking to Him. (That is a story for another day.) Whenever I enjoy a peaceful conversation with my Lord and Savior, I am always alone, it is quiet, no one is around to interrupt or distract... All this to say, I most likely won't have that morning quiet time once I am married. So, my next question would be, how am I going to put God first while I am married? (Probably a good thing to figure out before I actually do get married...)

Here are some things I have been thinking about... How will I put God first in my marriage... Well, I have always imagined my husband and I reading our Bibles together when we got up in the morning. Most likely he (and maybe I to start with) will have a job that begins sometime in the morning (say a 9-5 job). If this is the case and I too am working, I would (and usually do even now) pray in my car. Like I said I do this even today, and it is a great time to spend with God. We really shouldn't be doing anything else while driving anyways... :) If (or when) I have kids, I would like to stay home and take care of them. In this instance, when my husband goes off to work, I would like to spend some quiet time with the Lord before my kids wake up, or maybe while they are napping. Also, while my kids are growing up, I will want to teach them about the Bible, prayer, God, Etc... These are all ways in which I would still get a quiet time with God and honor Him, but still be able to enjoy my husband and family. :)

In conclusion, I would like to point out that honoring your husband, serving him, and making him happy is in a special way serving and honoring God. The Bible tells us to submit to our husbands (1 Peter 3:1, Colossians 3:18, Ephesians 5:22). Do so as unto the Lord. So in following or submitting to our husbands we are obeying God and His instructions for us!

I want to come up with more ways to honor God and spend time with him while my husband is there. If you have any suggestions, please leave a comment below! I would be very excited to hear your thoughts and ideas!

~ S*

Hmmm...

I was invited to visit a church that a friend goes to on Sundays. I've been told that a lot of good Christian (college) guys attend... What do you think? :) I think it could be an interesting idea. I could visit a couple times. It definitely wouldn't hurt me. Being the shy person that I am, I may recruit my sister to join me in the effort. :) We shall see... When I go, I will be sure to let you know how it turns out...

Anyways... I have not been distracted too much by my thoughts today. (It has been a pretty busy day though...) I did see a cute guy or two at Greaters this afternoon, but they were probably younger than me by a few years. For some reason I feel like "the guy" should be close to me in age unless he is older... Just something I would prefer I guess...

Story for the day. My friend invited my sister and I to go to a purity conference that was going to be held over a weekend at her church. My mom loved the idea, so we were kinda told we had to go. I actually ended up enjoying the conference. Once again, I had my sister by my side. :) We were told lots of inspirational stories by other girls in our little "group". One of the stories shared was a girl who was wearing a heart shaped necklace, and the heart had a key hole in the middle. She said that her dad had a key that fit the heart, and it was a symbol of her dad holding the key to her heart until she meets her husband. When she does, her dad would give the key to her husband. So romantic right!?! I love the concept of my dad holding the key to my heart. Anyways... That is a tiny story for today.

Let me know what you think, or if you have something in particular you would like me to talk about! :)

~ S*